Officer Boscorelli, man of love
by Boscosbabe55
Summary: A fun song fic that came to mind at a college football game.


Sexiest officer of the year  
  
A/N: Okay I got this idea at the VOL walk today. I heard the song and was like dude I could do something with that. So I take a few things from an old story I wrote and added a little more plus this song. No more VOL walks for me, I think. I sea of Orange and White makes Fyre go crazy. Anyways it's just basically for laughs so i hope you all get that out of this.  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters or lyrics. I'm only renting them.  
  
I'm too sexy for my love too sexy for my love  
  
Love's going to leave me  
  
I always stop by a mirror and check myself out. I don' know how or why it even started, but when your are as fine Italian Stallion such as myself,  
you can't help but to check your self out.  
  
I'm too sexy for my shirt too sexy for my shirt  
  
So sexy it hurts  
  
And I'm too sexy for Milan too sexy for Milan  
  
New York and Japan  
  
And I'm too sexy for your party  
  
Too sexy for your party  
  
No way I'm disco dancing  
  
I'm standing in the locker room mirror, with no shirt on. Damn Boscorelli you are really one Fine mother fucker! I say to myself, as I run my hand down my chiseled chest and smile.  
  
"Bosco what are you doing?" Faith asks me, she seems confused by my action. Either that or she's taken by my handsome beauty. I think I'll go with the second one  
  
I Turn around and smile. "Oh jus' admiring on of God greatest creation" Myself!  
  
"Don't strain your self there Boscorelli." Sully boastfully says. You see Sullivan is jealous. Look at him, then--look at me. Huh? Which you do you like better--yup I thought so, smart choice there. "Bite me Sullivan!" I say turning around walking over to my locker.  
  
"I love it when you talk dirty to me Bosco!" He tells me, with an amused smile on his face. Sully and Davis laughing, like it's show time at the Apollo or something.  
  
I'm a model you know what I mean  
  
And I do my little turn on the catwalk  
  
Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah  
  
I do my little turn on the catwalk.  
  
I finish getting dressed, but my uniform over my vest. If you could see how hot I made this uniform look. It should be a crime to look this good. You'd like even better if that uniform was on your bedroom floor. No--it's okay you don' have to lie. Frankly I don' blame you. If I were gay, which trust  
me I ain't. I'd like to see it on my bedroom floor as well.  
  
I'm too sexy for my car too sexy for my car  
  
Too sexy by far  
  
And I'm too sexy for my hat  
  
Too sexy for my hat what do you think about that  
  
I walk out of the precinct and smile as some girls walk by. I adjust my hat as they smile back to me, Still lookin' at me. They want me, I know they want me....who can blame them. A lot of girls want me. But there's only one of me...what a shame. I walk over to the driver side door, the girls look  
back at me, smile and giggle...Oh they so want me. I smile to myself. People Magizine really should make me their Sexiest Man alive. I mean who  
better then Maurice 'Bosco' Boscorelli Right? Right?  
  
I'm a model you know what I mean  
  
And I do my little turn on the catwalk  
  
Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah  
  
I shake my little touché on the catwalk  
  
I'm too sexy for my too sexy for my too sexy for my  
  
'Cus I'm a model you know what I mean  
  
And I do my little turn on the catwalk  
  
Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah  
  
I shake my little touché on the catwalk  
  
The first half of our shift was rather boring. There wasn't one exciting call. Faith an' I jus' drove around all day. Finally stoppin' for dinner. We meet up with Sullivan an' Davis. You should see Sully eat. He's like a damn Hoover Vacuum cleaner, he jus' inhales the damn thing. A double cheeseburger for him is a snack. An' he wonders why he's so fat. He's a hater, he hates that I make the uniform looks so damn good, where as he makes it look so damn - round. I finished my meal. A chicken Sandwich with Mozzarella Cheese. Was pretty damn good. I looked over at Faith as I placed Seven dollars on the counter. "I'm goin' take a leak." I told her, not waiting for her reply. I walked into the restroom, and over to the urinal. I unzipped my pants an' looked down as I relived myself. "Yup Boscorelli, you definitely need a yardstick." I said to my self as I did that whole shaking the rest of the pee out. Ya know what I mean, ya shake your....Okay that's jus' too much info, bet ya really don' wanna hear all that. I don' blame you either, especially if you saw mine. You'd be green with envy. I zipped my pants back up, went over to the sink and washed my hands. Givin' myself one last look in the mirror. Honestly bein' this damn good lookin' really should be a crime. Maybe I should arrest myself?  
  
I'm too sexy for my cat too sexy for my cat  
  
Poor pussy poor pussy cat  
  
I'm too sexy for my love too sexy for my love  
  
Love's going to leave me  
  
And I'm too sexy for this song 


End file.
